I sit here looking out the window on this bewitching night, trying to come up with excuses to convince myself that it’s not me, trying to block out the world, just to forget for a while. Forget every damn emotion that you made me feel. I lie in my bed and close my eyes in hopes that I won't remember this if I just fall asleep right now. I couldn't. I had to pen down how I felt, I had to pen down what feeling numb meant. So, I blatantly started scribbling, scribbling about how different things would have been, had I only been enough, promising myself to be stronger and braver the next time, promising myself that two months from now, when I decide to change my bedroom’s wallpaper from lavender to turquoise, I won't break down because that colour wont mean anything by then, promising myself that when I am kissing somebody eight months down the line, I won't compare it to how your lips felt on mine, promising myself that I wont remember how broken and helpless you made me feel when I bled on the floor while you stood there watching me from afar without making a move to help me up, promising myself that this will be the last time I write about you or how you wrecked a havoc without so much as a whisper in my ear. -c.m.
I have been looking for you for so long now. In cold winter nights when I needed somebody to hold or in dark alleys when I was too scared of what is awaiting on the other end, in boring parties where I didn’t even want to go in the first place or while drinking my morning coffee that would have seemed sweeter had you been around.
Did I tell you how I wanted to give up after my first heartbreak?
But I am still the same hopeless romantic I was before my first heartbreak. And I am still looking for you, with every broken piece in me, that’s calling out to you.
Did I tell you how much I admire nirvana as a band?
But as I grew up, I realised that I liked Nirvana, not because of their music but there was something in the name. Nirvana is a state of mind that is tranquil, a place where no pain can get to you. For me, finding nirvana wasn’t about finding a place that gives you peace and acts like a protective haven, instead, it was always about finding a person to call home. Months have gone by, as I have waited, with a warm cup of chai in one hand and a good book in the other, for I wasn’t going to let go.
I don’t believe in soulmates but, I do believe in finding my nirvana. And I think I found it in you. -c.m.
Стою на берегу одна,
И ветер дует мне в лицо,
Душа моя всегда грустна,
Что в этой жизни мне дано?
Найти себя я не могу,
Я сдесь потеряна судьбой,
В закат возьму я и уйду,
Я вся пропитаная тьмой.. И тут неуспев моргнуть глазом,
Я встретила тебя случайно,
Ты весь внутри горел огнём!
А я влюбилася нечаянно.
Неверила я в чудеса,
Ты навсегда будешь моим,
Я так с тобою счастлива,
И не отдам тебя другим💕 .
Repost @theartdistricts (@get_repost)
‘The Water Bull’
Stedelijk Museum Amsterdam @stedelijkmuseum
In 1945, Jackson Pollock moved from New York City to Long Island close to the Accabonac Creek. After moving here, Pollock began to introduce in his work themes alluding to nature. Pollock's The Water Bull is part of the Accabonac Creek Series, which comprises paintings completed before the summer of 1946. The works from this series show marked, bright and cheery, thinned out colour. Specifically, The Water Bull is largely composed of paint straight from the canisters, thick, unmixed, and dominated by red, black and green in contrast with thin washes of paint. The painting features varied black lines, assorted textures, clashing rather than harmonious colour and an immediacy in which the paint is applied to the canvas. All this lends a feeling of liveliness to the painting. The image of a bull was often used by Pollock and symbolizes masculine aggression and power.
Sobre los supuestos de las hipótesis,di en la tecla.
Sobre la tecla que haría estallar las expectativas,di en el blanco.
Sobre el blanco que marcaba el inicio; terminé.
Sobre la línea de las posibilidades, quebré.
Sobre la quiebra definitiva, renací.
Sobre la base del primer aliento, respiré.
Bajo las 15, las 20, y las casi 30 lunas que me preceden, crecí.
Bajo el velo de la dualidad, creé.
Bajo el latido de 8 sobre 7, te di la vida, se escapó, y con ella me esfumé.
Bajo el llanto de tu absoluto y desesperante silencio,desperté.
1. Right now, I am conducting a book giveaway until May 23rd. 4 lucky persons will have the chance to win my 2nd book.
2. May 24th, my book will be free to anyone who has kindle for 5 days.
3. After all the fun is done, I will sell a couple of signed books to those who are interested.
Look after yourself from within, and your beauty will shine through on your skin. Believe in yourself every day and confidence will make you shine from the inside out and nothing will be out of reach! •